Outraged parents Why Miley Cyrus performance sets girls and women back

Editor's note Kelly Wallace is CNN's digital correspondent and editor at large covering family career and life. She's a mom of two girls and lives in Manhattan. Read her other columns and follow her reports at CNN Parents and on Twitter.

(CNN) My list of reasons why I'm glad my girls ages 5 and 7 were too young to ever get into Hannah Montana grew exponentially longer after Miley Cyrus' unforgettable twerking in a bra and undies at MTV's Video Music Awards).

Miley what exactly were you thinking pretty much sums up the sentiment I heard from outraged moms and dads around the country who believe Cyrus whose loyal fan base includes a huge chunk not yet old enough to drive should know better.

It's a damn shame that Miley is doing this to herself making a vulgar joke out of her talents and her beauty but it's a much bigger shame that she's doing it to her young fans and other young people (who) see her in the media said Heidi Cardenas a mom of two teenage boys in response to a request for comment on CNN's Facebook page.

It's the same thing as going to any street corner in America and selling herself for money said Cardenas.

I have to instantly think that Miley does not either a) care what her younger fans think of her or b) hasn't even bothered to think of what her actions (are) doing to her image said Larene Grady a mom of two whose tween was absolutely infatuated with Cyrus but isn't anymore.

She thinks Miley does not appeal to children (who) used to like her as 'Hannah Montana ' which speaks volumes coming from a 10 year old who had two 'Hannah Montana' parties everything from bed sheets pajamas bath soaps toothbrushes and book bags Grady added also in response to a tout on CNN's Facebook page.

Hannah Montana seems about as relevant to the current day Cyrus as a typewriter is to millenials.

Watch Miley Cyrus' shocking VMA act

Miley Cyrus twerks stuns VMAs crowd

Miley Cyrus became a household name for families when her Disney Channel television show Hannah Montana premiered in 2006. Cyrus now 20 quickly rose to pop star fame and has been changing her appearance ever since. Here the singer attends a July 12 event in Los Angeles. The future pop star with her father Billy Ray Cyrus in October 1994 in Memphis Tennessee. The father and daughter team make a New York appearance for the Disney Channel in February 2006. Cyrus performs during the Radio Disney Totally 10 Birthday Concert in July 2006 in Anaheim California. Cyrus appears at the 2007 American Music Awards in Los Angeles. Cyrus arrives at a film premiere in Hollywood in January 2008. Cyrus performs for ABC's Good Morning America at New York's Bryant Park in July 2008. Cyrus appears at the Nickelodeon Kids' Choice Awards in Westwood California in 2009. Cyrus and her mother Tish Cyrus at the 52nd Annual Grammy Awards in January 2010 in Los Angeles. Cyrus performs at a music festival in June 2010 in Arganda del Rey Spain. The singer arrives at the 2012 Billboard Music Awards in Las Vegas in May 2012. The grown up Cyrus performs during the VH1 Divas concert in Los Angeles in December. Cyrus shows off her moves with Robin Thicke during the 2013 MTV Video Music Awards in Brooklyn New York on Sunday August 25. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 Photos Evolution of Miley Cyrus

The 20 year old has every right to chart a new course beyond her Disney days moms and dads said in comments on Facebook and exchanges via e mail. It's just that the path she is choosing seems so wrong and dangerous many said.

O M Miley From teen queen to too grown

Sonia Prince of Nashua New Hampshire said her kids ages 9 12 and 13 will no longer be listening to Cyrus' music. There is enough fantastic music out there with people who have respectful behavior especially women who don't feel the need to be sexual in public in order to be successful she added.

Cyrus' choice to wear next to nothing and strut around the VMA stage is yet another example frustrated parents say of the sexualization of our young girls an issue we touched on at CNN.com just a few weeks ago in our piece on how too many tween fashions are too sexy skimpy and short.

I do think Miley wrongly represents the way girls should act today said Steve a CNN commenter who shared his first name and the fact that he has a 12 year old granddaughter.

The way they dress act not caring about how other people may respond to your actions Steve added. I think it is an oversexualization of young girls/young women.

Robin Belkin a mom of three in Northern California believes Cyrus' performance only adds to the already damaging image of women as sex objects.

I just find it extremely discouraging and difficult to hold out hope for the improved status of women in this world when even the most entitled among us so negatively reinforce the worst stereotypes and misogynistic attitudes about women said Belkin.

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Miley Cyrus' performance shocks fans

Her behavior sets 50 to 60 years of women's forward progress back a long way when you consider that her huge fan base really only consists of young and impressionable girls and horny young boys who unfortunately on many levels are our future leaders said John Rodrigues of Boston on CNN's Facebook page.

Critic Miley gave me nightmares

Growing up under the impression that this behavior is not only OK but acceptable is such a terrible message and in this case I am happy I'm not a father trying to keep this away from my children the 35 year old single Army veteran added.

Eric Solomon a father of two watched the VMAs with his 15 year old son. I am so embarrassed and sitting next to my son and watching this happen made me even more embarrassed he added.

Solomon said he has conversations with his sons about what's right and what's wrong and said that they know Cyrus' performance was not appropriate and not the behavior of your normal woman.

Mary Hogan of Cordova Tennessee doesn't have kids but works in education and says parents have a role to play.

Parents need to explain to their kids that what she did is not OK and should not be imitated said Hogan adding that parents who didn't like what they were seeing should have changed the channel.

I think the biggest responsibility for a parent is to know what their kids are watching said Mark Edwards of suburban St. Louis who has three teenage sons. The VMAs aren't appropriate for kids under a certain age and if some parents feel discomfort over what was aired should they have been letting their kids watch the show in the first place

The VMAs are supposed to be shocking said a woman who did not want to be identified. Why is Miley Cyrus such a big deal ... I am more shocked people are watching the VMAs with their children.

Miley Cyrus upholds MTV VMAs tradition

After all consider VMA highlights of years past when Lady Gaga donned a dress made entirely of raw meat and Madonna and Britney Spears kissed (mouths open ). It was in fact at the VMAs years earlier when Madonna broke out onto the national stage with her Like a Virgin performance.

Cyrus took a page straight out of Madonna's playbook said Ivan Baker a father in New York City on Facebook. I guess I am jaded. Not very impressed or shocked.

While much of the online conversation post Cyrus' national twerking episode was dominated by criticism there was also a very motherly and fatherly response parents who worry that Cyrus is a child in need of serious help.

It's clear that Miley Cyrus' lifestyle as a young woman is expressing pain and is dealing with emotional problems said Andrew Thompson an engaged father of two boys in Country Club Hills Illinois.

Her mother and father have a responsibility to come to her aid and work out these social issues before it's too late he added.

Some parents said there was only one upside they could see from the blistering reaction to Cyrus' performance and that is that it may show strength.

The fact that she doesn't play the victim and shows that girls can be as aggressive and bad in many ways might in some twisted way pave the way for (women) to play in a more level field with men said Leigh Bordbar a mom of two from Toronto who said she was personally disappointed with what Cyrus did at the VMAs. In her performance she seemed like the one in control and in the driver's seat which sets her apart from the ways that perhaps Playboy or fashion models portray women.

Nicky Calvert a mom of two in Marietta Ohio sees another positive.

There is only one good thing that I can say about her performance on the VMAs said Calvert. It shows her 9 year old how she should never act in public.

May I repeat how happy I am my girls missed this one completely.

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